Have you ever felt lost on the inside?
Our internal compass can gradually point away from true north so that it takes us a while to wake up and realize we don’t know ourselves very well anymore. When we’re intent on the requirements of the people around us, or just plodding along through the list of tasks in a day, we can forget who we are and what we need.
Our culture doesn’t leave road signs reminding you to pause and gaze inside. Instead, it hurries you along whether or not the deeper parts of you can keep the pace. And when you can’t keep up, sometimes you leave you behind.
Then like Lady Gaga, weeks or months or years later, when it’s time to stop and reflect, you might realize that you lost you at some point along the way.
We all have demands on our time. When you can’t keep up with what you are demanding you to be, it is natural to shame yourself for needing rest, breaking down or not meeting everyone’s—including your own—expectations. Lots of us struggle with judging and pointing fingers at ourselves.
In her newest book, Rising Strong, Brené Brown writes that “the most dangerous stories we make up are the narratives that diminish our inherent worthiness. We must reclaim the truth about our lovability, divinity and creativity.”
So how do you reclaim your true self?
Here are some practical tips:
- Stop judging you—you don’t have power in the past, so become at home in the now. Catch yourself when you feel tempted to harshly judge past actions or critique failures. And reframe the story you tell yourself. You can abandon the shame that tries to worm its way into the narrative.
- Be like Lady Gaga and break the yes habit. Stop saying yes to everyone and everything. Step back and say – let me check my schedule and get back to you. Or, even a blunt no is alright. You are in charge of you and your activities.
- Breathe in and out—practicing awareness is a rare habit but a profound one that allows you to learn more about yourself, i.e. what your body is feeling or what types of thoughts you replay.
- Discover—Sign up for a new class, read a new book or visit a new place. Trying new things helps you learn about you! You might discover a secret love or talent that you never knew what hibernating deep inside
Reclaiming yourself might be a long process. But it’s one that is worthwhile because it allows you to truly get to know the real you, the one that you can be proud of.
