Imagine staring directly into someone’s eyes for 30 seconds. No, you can’t look away. Yes, you have to stay silent. How do you think it would make you feel? For many of us, it’d probably feel awkward and uncomfortable. It takes courage to do an exercise like this from our Leap to Confidence class. Without being able to break the tension with language or a quick glance to the side, we are left feeling completely vulnerable. They say your eyes are the window to your soul, and someone staring directly into your soul for an extended period of time is about as vulnerable as it gets!
But why do we need to be vulnerable? Most of us would prefer to spare ourselves the awkwardness and avoid the feeling whenever we can. However, that unpleasant feeling may actually help you grow and evolve as a person. The need to allow vulnerability into your life can be summed up in one quote:
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.”
This quote, from researcher Brené Brown (whose brilliant Ted Talks are linked below), seems pretty straightforward. Be vulnerable, and you can see great change in your life. But how exactly do you allow vulnerability into your life?
Here are some ways you can let yourself be vulnerable in order to open yourself up to change:
Welcome Rejection
While no one enjoys being rejected, accepting it as an integral part of life—in everything from finding a job to finding a romantic partner—allows you to go for what you want, despite what the outcome may be.
Want to apply for a dream job that you don’t think you’re qualified for? Then go ahead and apply. The worst thing can happen is they say no. You can handle that. The best thing? The hiring manager could interview you for the job, or mention another position that they think you’d be a great fit for, or introduce you to someone who might be able to help you in your career search…the possibilities are endless!
Don’t let fear of rejection stand in the way of the next step in your career—or any other path in your life.
Be Willing to Put Yourself Out There
Do you have a passion for writing? Start a blog and start sharing your pieces online. Want to get to know your co-workers a little better? Host a dinner party at your house and get to know them beyond the workplace. Have you always wanted to try your hand at painting? Find a local class and bring out your inner Picasso or Monet. Show your pieces to your loved ones—or even enter some pieces into an art show! Be open to new experiences in your life.
The fear of failing or not being good at something may be present, but don’t let yourself shy away from the chance to have new experiences that could add value, growth, and connection to your life!
Don’t View Vulnerability as a Weakness
In one of Brené Brown’s Ted Talks, she explains vulnerability as:
“I define vulnerability as emotional risk, exposure, uncertainty. It fuels our daily lives. And I’ve come to the belief…that vulnerability is our most accurate measurement of courage — to be vulnerable, to let ourselves be seen, to be honest.”
As soon as you accept vulnerability as a sign of strength and courage, you can begin to more openly allow it into your life. Have the courage to be willing to let vulnerability in.
Check out Brené Brown’s Ted Talks—click here for one on the power of vulnerability (where the quotes from above came from), and here for one on the relationship between shame and vulnerability.
Think of ways you can start allowing vulnerability in your life, and don’t forget—vulnerability is courage!
